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look at this this sample paragraph:
Perspective 3 states that, “Intelligent devices challenge our idea that is longstanding of people are and certainly will be.” I agree with this particular concept. In 2014, an awful tragedy took place during the Boston Marathon. Two bombs went down near the conclusion line, and three individuals were killed. Lots of individuals were additionally hurt, and several limbs that are even lost. But, with new improvements in technology, lots of the victims could actually take advantage of high-tech prosthetics, which permitted them to come back to lives that are normal even perform sports. This “pushes humans and devices toward brand new possibilities” (Perspective 3).
There’s nothing terribly incorrect with this specific paragraph. It’s grammatically correct, clear and concentrated, and utilizes among the perspectives that are outside help.
Having said that, it features quick, declarative statements, and relatively small variation that is stylistic. There’s also only 1 transition (“however”), and attitude 3 is actually dropped to the paragraph without much introduction. The quotation that is final never talked about or analyzed; your reader is kept to get in touch it into the information that precedes it. Fundamentally, this can be quintessential school writing that is high.
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